My head hurts a bit. My face is a little swollen. My belly is bloated and I feel guilty. Last night I was tempted by the pumpkin flavored treats section of Trader Joes. I bought pumpkin, chocolate, granola bark (3 of my favorite things combined) and ate the whole bag.
This isn’t a new story. It has happened many times before…
I had an emotional day. My period was in full swing, I didn’t prepare enough protein to eat during the day and was really feeling lonely. I called my mom later in the afternoon as I was walking my dog, Lucy around the neighborhood telling her how much I was missing something in my life.
Then I sat on the couch, put on one of my favorite TV shows and filled my favorite mug full of the pumpkin bark. There I sat. This feeling of nostalgia came over me. And I started to cry. Before I knew it, I ate the whole bag.
It started as a few innocent pieces in my mug. Then it turned into reaching for a few more, putting the bag away and swearing that those were the last three chunks. Okay, fine. One more helping and that’s when I found that the bag is now empty.
Guilt. Frustration. Sadness. Unworthiness. Belly fat. I lost control. Again… My perfect image of myself is ruined, again…
Does this sound familiar to you?
Sometimes it may feel like breaking your unhealthy relationship with sugar is impossible. Like before you know it, the whole bag of pumpkin, chocolate, granola bark is gone. And the cycle happens again the next day.
The reason you may have this addiction is because you are eating to fill a void. You are eating to make yourself feel better or to heighten the emotions that you are already feeling. And you become addicted to that process.
Sugar is more addictive than cocaine. It gives you a very high high but also a very low low. When you eat it for the wrong reasons, it will become your best friend and also your crutch. It will sneak into your day as much as it can because you can’t help it. It’s not about will power. It’s actually about the fact that your body is trying to help you feel better by reaching for something. But unfortunately, that something is only a temporary fix.
When we feel lonely, sad or stressed, it’s easy to cover that up with something else. But instead of reaching for the candy, alcohol, drugs or whatever it is we use, we can learn to break that cycle. The first step is being conscious of it. When does this happen? Why? What's going on in your day at this point in time?
Yesterday, there is no way that I could teleport my mom back to Colorado. That is what I was mourning. But I now know how much I miss her and certain parts of my life that are gone. So instead of beating myself up over my sugar binge, I am going to thank myself for waving a huge, red flag at me to show that there is something missing. And now I can go find it.
Pura Vida | holistic health coaching
Contact me to schedule your free initial consultation and learn how to get started on the road to a healthier you.