What do you want? That is the first question I ask my clients when I meet with them. Most of them respond with something like this: "I want to lose 20lb by June so I can look fabulous on the beach". I understand why that is the typical answer. It's safe, normal, numerical, measurable (like most everything in our number obsessed society) and doesn't leave much room for question. Cool. 20lbs. Got it.
But that is not the end of the question. Every goal or "resolution" we desire to achieve comes from a place much deeper than our waistlines. Not to get too forward too quickly (well that's actually thrown out the window), but why the hell do you want to lose 20lbs?!?! Okay, so you said to look better in a swim suit. But why? For whom? What will be different when you are in a bikini weighing 20lbs less.
The desire to reach a goal comes from a place that is much deeper than we want to allow ourselves to process. So many people come to me with these weight loss goals and aspirations that actually have nothing to do with the weight! It has to do with you. And why. And how you want to feel.
I can say from experience that opening up to the why of our desired actions instinctively makes us put up a wall to keep us from becoming vulnerable. Vulnerability is known to be a bad thing. But in my opinion, becoming more vulnerable connects us with honesty which will actually get to the root of our desire.
When I started my journey of health and wellness, I thought I wanted flat abs. That was it. All I wanted was a six pack and I would be happy and everyone would love me and my boyfriend or significant other would think I am the sexiest woman in the world. But as I broke down the barriers of WHY I actually wanted to have these results, it had absolutely nothing to do with my midsection. All I really wanted was to feel a certain way. I didn't actually matter if someone thought I was sexy or if I actually had the flat tummy, it mattered how I felt once I was there. I wanted to FEEL happy. I wanted to FEEL loved. I wanted to FEEL sexy. And a six pack would never get me there.
When it comes to being honest with what you want, it doesn't serve you to pretend like you want something different. Kind of seems obvious but it's surprising how difficult it is. If you want to lose weight to look a certain way it may be interesting to dig a little deeper with that goal. Why do you want that? Will you be happier when you get there?
Be honest with yourself. Be a little vulnerable. It may get you to the root of your desire. Finally.
Pura Vida | living the pure life
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#sleepselfie - because my favorite part of the day is waking up -
"It's like, it's like your rib cage is a jail cell, holding all that love in. So, I want you to take your fist, take your fist, and grab your heart and hold it in the air, hold that love in the air and open your fingers, one at a time if you need to, and let that love out. " #loveart
fresh to 💀 #feelingfreshasfuck #greens
If I am thankful (and slightly embarrassed as a kid) for one thing, it's for your love and influence of music- in my heart and soul fo sho. Cheers dad 🍻 ⚡️🌹#beatles #tubaman #grateful #mydadisabadassmusician
Hugs not drugs #sisters👭
I don't think I have ever felt as at home as as I do here. I think back on all of the cities, the apartments and places I have lived. I used come back from California wishing that I lived there. This time I came back craving these mountains and this awesome,alive community. Home is where your heart is. Mine really is here. #colorado #grassaintgreener #wineaintsweeter #welcomehomehunny
Life, out of the depths, will clarify things for you only if you wish to see your challenges as an opportunity of growth. Sometimes we need rain. #itstimetogrowtoday
If you know me.... #steinerohhowlovely #mirandahillardplease
The Hollywood shows were amazing. Unfortunately there was a threat in the middle of the first show that had my heart in my throat. The interesting thing as I reflect was that my fear was actually for @bobweir And @deadandcompany . And my fellow neighbors. I truly felt it for my life last. These lessons are learned through the message of this music. Despite it all, the energy from this crowd was peaceful and alive. I am so thankful for finding this music and for my two friends who helped me get there. #pleasespreadpeace #wavethatflagwaveitwideandhigh #grateful ✌️
I finally made it home #homeiswherethedeadis #grateful